Let Me Clear My Throat...

I confess that I have done all these things, said all these things, thought all these things. I am Jacks Medulla Oblongata.

1. Hey Walmart! My Walmart has 12 parking aisles with 30 stalls per aisle. So why is it that you only put 2 cart return spots per aisle and none go past the 12th stall? Why the frick do you leave 60% of the parking lot uncovered so lazy asses have an excuse to leave their cart in the middle of the driving lane?

2. Hey cashier! I don't care what your personal bagging preferences are. If I put bottles and cans in the same pile, pack them that way. If I put all my like sized boxes together I don't care if you want to seperate food items from sundries. I like my system.

3. Hey customer behind me! This the land of Manifest Destiny. Don't fricken crowd me at the ATM readerwhile I am waiting to pay for my grocery's. The cashier hasn't gotten 1/2 way thru my items on the conveyer belt I don't need you lining up nut to butt on me. This ain't a port-a-pottie line at the local Race For The Cure 5k. Let me get my damn wallet out without giving you an elbow in the gut.

4. Hey CVS Pharmacy! What kind of fricken customer service program do you think you have? Your rebate card is a joke. For the privillage of one more peice of worthless plastic in my wallet that gives Big Brother one more way to track my spending, I save $1.00 per two prescriptions. Last month I bought 15 prescriptions totalling $800 out of pocket. Thats $7.50 in my pocket with your card. Less than 1% return for being hassled for your card every time I'm in your store, which I wouldn't use if you gave me 1.25% rebate.

5. Hey PostMaster General! Why does every jerkward with a postal meter sending out junk mail and advertisements have the first amendment right to send me crap I don't want, but I don't have the right to refuse it. I don't want mail addressed to 'resident', 'home owner' or 'auto sort'. Its a burden on me to open that crap up and shred it thoroughly to make sure some ass doesn't fill out a form or use one of those nifty balance transfer checks pre filled with my name on it. Your contributing to identity theft.

6. Hey you driving the big fricken SUV! Just because its big doesn't give you the right to jam up my ability to get in and out of my truck you parked next too. I put those rubber bumbers on my door frame so I can slam my door into your vehicle denting and scratching up your baby because your a callous insensitive prick. Just know this, if you don't want a dent, then park straight and within your stall or park further out in the lot.

7. Hey Girl Scout Mom! If your gonna put your kid in front of a grocery store to sell cookies don't give me dirty looks when I tell her no the first time, the second time or the third. When I walk out and she acts like she doesn't remember me and asks again and I tell her, "No, girl scout cookies will make you turn into a big fat pig and no one will take you to the dance" don't scowl at me when she cry's. Its your fault for putting her under that pressure to succeed. She's fricken ten years old! Give her another eight years before she has to learn how to use her wiley ways to sucker money from older men.

8. Hey rich car guy! 90% of the population could care less if you drive a $30,000 car or a $100,000 car. Don't take up two prime parking spots by parking diagonally across them. No one wants to scratch their own car up (unless you hem them in) don't be so pretencious and shallow.

9. Hey Sun City West! I don't care if your whole town was voted a 55 and older community by its residents. Don't kick out a grandma whose lived in her house for 30 years when she happens to be the sole relative of an 8 year old girl whose parents were killed in an accident. You'd rather the girl go to CPS? Your all heart old folks. Remind me why I put up with you driving 15 mph in a 35 zone?

10. Hey ABC news! I don't care if you PC the term illegal aliens from Mexico, but don't call them ' refugees' or use cute, unrecognizable quasi-military acronyms like U.M.W.'s Which took me all of a minute to realize means Undocumented Migrant Workers. I might think it means Uses My Wealth.

10a. Hey every other local nightly news program! Why is it that you speak in a perfect, non-regional specific dialect except when pronouncing hispanic names and terms. When you say Whites you say...Whites. When you say Latinos, you say...Laaa-Teen-Os. When Rob Curtis signs off he dosen't roll his 'R's, so why does Maria Rrrrrrodrrrriquez get a pass? I'm half Hawaiian and half Dutch, you don't see me signing off my blogs with Mahalo-Akkoord ("Thank You-Okay")

11. Hey Katrina victim! I am sorry about your personal tragedy. But after getting room and board on the Arizona taxpayer since last summer, don't hit me up with your sign at the freeway exit that says: "God Bless-I am a Katrina Victim. Blah Blah Blah. $$$" Get a damn job already or the U.M.W. might take it.

12. Hey local Fox channel! I don't care how many commericals you show per hour each night to sway public opinion otherwise but Prison Break sucks. Its a one trick pony that should have been a mini-series. Don't you ever get a fricken clue? And BTW, Entertainment Weekly couldn't give a bad review to Mien Kompf.

13. Hey DJ stop it with the Coldplay! The band is over rated and the music is not rock, its crap. Rock music should not sound like a lullabye. This what you get folks when you grow up listening to New Kids and Backstreet. Please Lord give me back the days when Van Halen and Guns N Roses were real rock. When bubble gum lipstick rock was still good with bands like Winger and Poison, not this whinny high pitched, 'I am a man but this is a girls voice' stuff that DJ's think should be Top 40. You are emasculating young men. Hell Michael Jackson had better guitar riffs on Billie Jean and Smooth Criminal than what I hear today. Why do I think that Kellie Clarkson is a bigger rocker than Coldplay?

Another ph. In post. i am so dam busy i cant see straight. Will try to string something together today. Darn life getting in the way of training

Long day working towards the monthly close out. Took mo to a dr. Appointment for all kinds of testing. The new theory is primary immune defic.

The Hammy Continued...

Went to see Dr. Simon, "Master of Many Therapy's" Monday to work on my issue. We have worked on it before and after some deliberation he has decided that I may need some unorthodox treatment to fix the problem.

For those just now following along, I have a strained or stressed Ishium which is part of the hamstring at the origin point underneath the left Gluteus Maximus. Trust me people I don't know all this stuff, I'm in the biz and had to ask him twice.

He has treated a few triathletes with this in the past and after several treatments saw no improvement. He consulted with a fellow progressive pro-athlete doctor on the last person with my symptoms, who gave the patient an injection of...crap I took the paper out of my pocket, I wrote it down...anyway a concoction that aided in the pain management department while at the same time promoting relaxation of the cramped muscle and healing of the area. On him it worked.

I'm willing to give him a shot. Haha unintentional bad pun on my part. I know this other doctor and have been wanting a tour of his facility for a while. He does some interesting stuff but more on that later. The thought process is that the shot of whatever will decrease healing time without hampering the training.

If nothing else its worth a shot. And that folks, after spending 30 minutes writing this post because its so freakin late and I can't think straight, was intentional.

I'm going to bed.

Making Cramp-ade

The interval/power workout Saturday left my legs pretty sore Sunday morning. I could tell Saturday night that an old hammy strain was back, its way up high at the origin point underneath my glute. I feel it sort of where the old wives tale tells young ladies to hold a pencil horizontal.

The hilly 40 we rode Sunday morning took a pounding on the strain and I was cramping and seizing hard driving out to the lake for a swim. The Machine, Hardcore, John and I decided to swim 4 laps around the buoy's for 2.4 miles. I got one lap done and as I round the buoy to head back into the canyon it felt like someone grabbed my leg and pulled me underwater. The cramp was massive.

So I limped in towards the shore and hung out on the cliff wall for a few minutes. I had a terrific veiw of the traffic and it was never ending. If I saw 400 motorcycles I saw 1. Groups of 20,30 or more riding into Tortilla Flats. The boater's were also out. I counted five within a couple hundred yards of the bridge we swim under. It made tacking a whole new game.

So I am sitting there on the rocks, the spasm's subsiding and getting drawn towards a boat in the middle of the swim zone we use. A HUGE 42 foot Sea Ray with a 28 inch flat screen over the galley door leading below. This older couple was cranking a dvd of an old, like mid-70's Styx concert. Great music. Well its sort of on the way over to the gear so I stroke over and the lady, see's me coming their way.

I stop a few feet from the fantail and yell up to her, "Is this Lake Havasu?" She replys, "No, it's Canyon Lake." I yell back, "Damn this isn't where I wanted to be for Spring Break." She laughs and we start a decent conversation with her and her husband. Great people. They are normal folks with an inkling about triathlon and uber-inpressed with Ironman distance stuff.

A few minutes into the conversation while I am treading water my hammy starts to get tight so I ask, "Is there a beer on board for tired swimmer?" "Sure, permission to come about sweety, you must be exhausted, let me get you a cold one."

So there I am in my wetsuit with neophrene cap, standing on the fantail of this $135,000 boat, a quarter through my Bush Light charming the crap outta these folks, listening to classic Styx, when John and Hardcore happen to swim by just a few yards from me. Hardcore takes a breath, looks up and just about swallows the lake when I raise my beer to him and ask how the water is. John see's me and looks incredulis. They keep going.

After about twenty minutes, The Machine is done with his swim, 56 minutes BTW, the bastard, and is lounging where I was before boarding The Wolverine, (aka the name of the big ass boat I'm drinking beer on) and decide its time to part company. I thank them for the beverage, replace my goggles and do my best "last man in the pool" jump.

After everyone finished we all had a big laugh since it was such a funny site. But like I told them and I tell everyone, You Gotta Have Fun. Drinking a beer was a lot more fun than sulking around with a cramped hammy waiting for everyone else to get done.

When life gives you cramps, make cramp-ade.

The Medal...and a celebrity sighting?

Okay I promise only two more posts on the Scottsdale Tri. This one and the one with some race pictures which I ordered and should have by mid week.

This is the silver medal that I earned in the Cyldesdale division. Never in my life did I think God would bless me with a podium finish in a triathlon. Needless to say, this has given me tremendous cache' with Mistress in regards to our Training Contract. I am entitled to a performance bonus.

And finally after bemoaning on several other blogs about my never having a racing picture taken that I am proud of, I have one on the way. This race ended up being a blessing on so many levels.

This morning instead of swimming I participated in an interval training session with Tribe Multisports Saturday ride. Because of the Havasu Tri and the 2.4 mile swim race on the IM course today the riders were scarce. I ended up being the advanced rider of the group which meant that I rode a lot on my own due to speed factors. We went through a series of power drills and interval training. I would get ahead a bit on my drills and would turn off to a side rode to cool down as the group did their drill and caught up. I really learned quite a bit and even thought the ride was 20 miles I felt much more wiped out than that

Kevin asked why I was doing that and my response was simple, "Regardless of ability level, I want to hear what your telling these people because I am always learning something from you."

When we got back to the shop, there were some IM guys dropping off their bikes before the open swim at the lake. One guy came in the door as I was coming out and out of the blue says, "Hey I just saw you online this morning, you're Comm's right?" He was really excited like he had drank a couple of Red Bulls or a quad latte, pumping my hand up and down. I said yeah that's me where did you see me. He just spews out this totally fast sentence that I didn't catch the answer to my question and then he and his brother bombed out of the store with him yelling over his shoulder, "Hey it was great to meet you, Comm's."

I just thought it was a surreal experience. How often do you run into someone you have never met that recognizes you and know's your name and is actually excited to you? I turn around and one of the guys in the store say, "Dude he just treated you like a rock star." "Yeah, I guess so," was all I could reply.

Damnedist thing huh?

Its A Mo-Reffic Day

Clicking on photos will increase resolution

For those that keep asking, "What the heck is a nebulizer?" Well here is the face piece Mighty Mo wear's up to 2 hours a day for his four treatments.

The ever present Moasuaros

When going out Mighty Mo perfers the preppy look of collared shirts and dress shorts.

He is a complete ham for the camera.

Too Good A Thing

Well it's the first 80 degree day of the year. Hallelujah! Its too good a thing to pass up so I ditched a little early to get in a brick. A solid 25 mile hill ride followed by a 2 mile run.

Ironman South Africa

Natasha Badman won her ninth Ironman Sunday in South Africa tying Lisa Bentley for most overall wins. Her overall time of 9:46:38 was 24 minutes faster than second place Diana McPherson.

Gerardus Schellens of Belgium came across first for the men in a time of 8:36:06. Never heard of him or anyone else in the top ten except Faris Al-Sultan who finished fifth.

Nothin but love Faris, stay strong.

I have never and would never reccommend gastric bypass surgery to someone regardless of how morbidly obese they become. Our society try's to change years of terrible living in a short period time without paying the necessary sacrifices for those poor decisions. I have seen more people lose weight and keep it off by giving up Common Man Syndrome in exchange for good nutritional changes and effective exercises than those that attempt to use radical surgery or extreme dieting.

Here though is a short but good article on one man's decision to do it and its after effects. Note the final outcome on the volume size of his meals post surgery, he can now eat regular portions again.

More Bike Porn

Last night I found my digital camera that I misplaced Saturday night, 3 days ago. It was in the back of my truck. It sat out there during the downpour that took place during my triathlon and the whole rest of the day and the squall that came through yesterday afternoon. I expected the worst but amazingly it fired right up. How cool is that?

This collection of pictures is taken from last Thursday when I went to Tribe to put the PHX together. Kevin and I worked on it from 8:30 p.m. to 1:00 a.m. Mostly he worked on it since he is the pro and its an interally cabled frame.

Frame weight is under two pounds without the fork and 2.7 pounds with. This is taken directly out of the box.

Everything pulled out of the box, minus rims. Sure doesn't look like many parts.

I really like how this came out. The checkering is because the frame is carbon fiber with a nude finish meaning that the layers are visible.

Not the best photo but it was late. Pretty much done.

If you look closely you will see a frame hanging behind the PHX in the third picture. It belongs to local Pro female. Its an Elite that has come straight from a powder coating paint job. Its a custom color so that it stands out and is incredibly strong so it won't chip. It only cost a $100 so maybe an option for those of you out there wanting to put new life on an older looking frame.

Bike Porn Two

Bike Porn...

The Prologue apparently since I am unable to load my two pictures. Will try again this afternoon.

Interesting thing happened on the way to the office today. I am wearing a pair of golf shorts today since its supposed to be nice. Slight chance of rain but, "Hey, its only rained twice in 151 days what are the odds?" Didn't I just go through that whole process with my triathlon last weekend?

Anyway I am wearing golf shorts today. They are long enough so that when I walk or stand you can not see the numbers written over my knees from race a couple days ago. I stopped off at a couple of places and someone said to me, "Hey what's with the numbers on the back of your leg"

"What?" Oh good Lord, I forgot about the race number written in large black ink going down the back of my leg calf.

Its going to be a great day to introduce people to triathlon. At least I can report good news when they invariably ask how I did.

Bike Porn later today.

2nd Place

I took 2nd in the Clydesdale Group at the Scottsdale Triathlon yesterday. I took 1st in my division. How cool is that! I have never had a podium finish before, not that I got to stand on one since it probably would have been underwater from the weather.

According to results I was 2nd overall, 1st in my division; I finished 9/14 in the swim, second fastest split on the bike and had the fastest run split.

No big news on the swim. I improved by over 3 minutes from last year, a 30% improvement but still a ways to go. I am super excited about the bike split since I got fitted for my PHX at 5 o' clock the night before the race and only put twenty miles on her during the shakedown. As I have stated I am most confident about my running and glad I could hold 7:30 pace.

I found out online last night around 8:30 and celebrated with Mistress by having a glass of champagne and a high five.

Race Report #2 2006: Scottsdale Tri

It was around 40 degrees and cloudy in the normally cloudless Valley Of The Sun at 0510 when I woke up 20 minutes late. The forcaster’s called a 40% chance of rain but when I looked out my window I didn’t see any storm clouds so I decided to leave my old bike at home and take the PHX with me. I mean really its rained once in 150 days what are the chances?

It pou-orrrrrrrrrrrrrd. Not just rain but lightening, thunder and hail. I would say it rained a solid ¼ inch, which is actually considerable in such a short period of time. Nothing was left untouched by the downpour.

About 20 people were able to make it through the swim before the lifeguards called the swim off due to thunder and lightening. They kept it going as long as they could but they did what had to be done in the name of safety and I commend them for it. In the 15 minutes it took before the race director could be notified and address the triathletes huddled in just swimming attire in two small rooms off the pool about 25% of the racers called it quits and went home. I can’t blame them I was riding a new bike and didn’t want to lay it down in a turn during a downpour. It didn’t help that the 4 loop 12 mile course has eight turns per loop. The race director came in and announced that after 30 minutes of no thunder and lightening the pool would be reopened. Those that left called us crazy and my response was, “If it ain’t rainin’, it ain’t trainin’. By the way, your leaving, what’s your age group?”

I had been shivering since my 0600 bike check in and my lower back was seizing up pretty bad, it was very tight and painful. I finally was able to get in the pool at 0930 and swim my 300 yard, 12 length serpentine, which took 7 minutes and couple seconds. I really wanted to be less than 7 minutes but I was just happy to get out of the water and get things going. I felt good the whole swim but my lane tacking needed some help as I got caught under a couple of lane lines.

I had a 2 minute T1 which consisted of not drying off, no sense in the rain, and turning my bike shoes upside down to drain the water out of them. I started to squeeze a sock out but thought, why do that and just put those on.

The bike took 37 minutes to travel 12 miles in 4 loops. On the few straight-away’s I was able to maintain a good 22 mph but I downshifted and applied brakes about 30 yards from each of the 8 turns on the loop so I kept losing speed which I normally would not have. The good news was that I passed about two dozen cyclists and only got past by 2 guys who are both amateur triathletes and not a ‘Middle of the Packer’ like me. I felt really good and the PHX is quite responsive. I was really leery about using the TT handlebars, especially in the downpour, since I am not used to shifting off the aero bar’s but they were great and the front end on this bike is so much lighter than my Giant. I had wanted to keep my ride at 36 minutes and finished in 37 minutes.

T1 was one minute. No messing around, just dumped my gear, turned over my running shoes to drain the water, punched the foot pod to get pace data on the Polar S625X and I was gone.

The first third of a mile I was running really stiff, my lower back was killing me. I was sitting around an 8:08 pace and then it finally loosened up and I was able to stay in the low 7’s. My heart rate was soaring in the mid to high 170’s but the rain and cold weather allowed me to push that redline all the way through the 5k course. It’s not totally flat and not totally straight but I was passing a lot of people, a dozen I would guess. I got past by 2 guys, one who I believe will place in the top 3 overall and the other in another age group, so I didn’t feel too bad about that. In the last third of a mile I sprinted at a 5:35 pace to finish at 1:11 on my watch. In my pre-race visualization I looked at 1:10 as being the absolute happiest I could hope for and 1:15 being a solid, more realistic time. So all in all, I am really happy about this event considering the weather conditions.

Unfortunately, because of the rain they didn’t post the placing’s at the event. They told everyone to go home, so I have to wait for them so show up online. I jammed home and jumped in the Jacuzzi for 30 minutes with a cup of coffee and just relaxed.

If you want a good laugh read this HERE my race report from this course last year.

Sleepy Doldrums

Finally getting the mental itch to ramp it up again. Things as I have related lately have been stressful and choatic and fast paced, overloaded with responsiblities to everyone but myself and my own normally selfish pursuits.

Admittedly it was a long push to get to this point, five months of hardcore training capped by 40 days of No Limits and the Epic Training Weekend. Everyone getting sick and injuried during a two week recovery/taper period was good timing though I feel I over-tapered by missing some base maintenence training.

Now I am physically feeling soft, put on a couple pounds and mentally tired of taking care of everyone else but me. Tired of putting off a run or ride or staying late for a swim so that I can do things for everyone else. Tired of being tired from things other than triathlon workouts. See told you I am selfish. This will be a good weekend to shake the cobwebs from the ol' empty barn upstairs, or what I refer to as my head.

I have been honest enough with myself that most all of my sporadic training the last two weeks is from being needed by others and not Common Man Syndrome. I am also honest enough to admit that that has not been the case the last 48 hours. I have had the time, the ability and the permission but not the motivation.

This morning I went for a 3 mile run, very easy ten minute pace while Mighty Mo had a nebulizer treatment. This afternoon is a bike fitting short ride to work out the kinks before the sprint tri tomorrow. Sunday is my first tri of 2006 (300y/12m/5k). After that the afterburners should kick in, the rally signal flashed into the sky ala The Bat Signal and the AzTriClub back to regular duties prepping its members for Ironman Arizona.

My goal over the next two month phase will be to drop some L-B's, incorporate some more upper body work and loosen up my back and legs. I am now pretty confident in all my abilities and have learned some valuable lessons over the winter to help with training for Florida.

Its blue sky from here on out.

Friday Update

Hardcore has not gone to the hospital after being dragged by a car yesterday in a biking accident. I just got off the phone with him and his ankle is popping a bit and his road rash is bleeding. I really don't know why he wouldn't go. Hardcore/Hardheaded.

Mighty Mo is feeling better but he is going in for a check up today while his regular team is in the office. Ho Hum, lately it feels like we need to make appointments every other Friday.

The PHX is ready except for the fitting. That was to be this morning but Kevin at Tribe is slammed slammed so I told him I would come by Saturday afternoon after I picked up my race packet for a sprint I am doing Saturday, weather permitting.

Episode 1: Rise of the PHX

This is my multi part expose on the carbon fiber PHX (phoenix) that I will be riding this year for Valdora Cycle's.

Episode 1
Today is the day that the PHX rises from the ashes and claims it rightful place at my side. I wanted to be there for the entire process of going from box to build to fit at Tribe Multisport. Since we knew it was going to take a while since they had only put a few speck peices togethers, a select few gathered after hours at The Tribe to assemble the bike while the store picked up some lost time during the day.

Your going to hate me but I am writing this at 0300 in the morning and I forgot my digital camera at the store. Pictures will have to wait until tomorrow afternoon.

I would like to tease that the weight of the frame without fork is under two pounds and with fork is just over 2.5 pounds. The total weight of the bike without water bottles is a nudge under 20 pounds.

The PHX carries Ultegra compo group with a Gossomer crank (very light and strong), Carbon Stryke aerobars, its a ten speed instead of a nine speed so I gain some gearing ratio's, I know in the stock photo I posted it shows Zipp wheels but I actually got Easton Vistas with my race kit, which are not as advanced as my Easton Circuits so I swapped those out with my other bike. The seat is a Valdora seat which looks and feels much like my current and favorite Serfas Tri Seat.

It took till 0100 to get it all put together and swapped and clean up the shop. Two of us sat around and fired off movie quotes for some time while Kevin worked on the second PHX being sold out of the store for tomorrow and some other bike building duties. He was still there when I left working away. The guy goes all out.

It became too late to do the fitting so back to the store at 11oo for that.

If you have made it this far I have a couple of medical announcements to make:
1. Mighty Mo is indeed sick again. Vomit city until passed out from exhaustion. Another weekend of attempting to keep him out of the emergancy room.
2. Mistress is feeling better, just in time, to nuture the Mo. Ankle is black and blue and a bit stiff. Pnuemonia is doing better.
3. Hardcore Mike, the training partner whom I gave my mtn. bike too so he could finish the Soma 1/2 IM after crashing badly in that October race, was in a car on bike accident today. An elderly man swiped him, taco'd the front wheel jamming it into the wheel well of the car and dragging both he and the bike about 20 feet until turning into a driveway to get off the road. Several people stopped to assist, the driver tried to keep the police out of it because it turns out he has a suspended lisense. He says he has insurance but none on him. Hardcore called me as his fiance drove him and the bike to Tribe to get it fixed before IMAZ in just a few short weeks. I tried to tell him to get to an ER after that but he said maybe tomorrow. He's just Hardcore like that.

Pictures today.

Triathlete Magazine Article

Thank you all for your input on empathy. Life is getting "Light and Bright" every minute. As most all you were able to deduce, I am not wallowing in self pity or depression, yesterday my cup just runeth over.

In better news, the latest issue of Triathlete Magazine came out with the Tri-Geek Dreamers/Tri-Blog Alliance article that I wrote last year. I hope it benefits everyone with some new viewers. I must admit it was edited slightly. Grannies? I would never use the word Grannies. But I am appreciative they actually published it.

Triathlete Magazine, April 2006, page 26

My accountant says I would be remiss without thanking the following people for giving me the opportunity to live an amateur triathlon lifestyle; my primary sponsor, my wife; my partners at Pure Fitness, go join today; Valdora Cycles; The AzTriClub and Nepsa Webhosting, take control of your domain today.

Thanks to Nancy for scanning this for me.

Tonight should be the night that the PHX is put together and I am fitted. Will bring the camera.

I think I broke my empathy bone

How long does it take you to lose all sense of emotion or empathy over an overwhelming situation? I'm not talking about being angry, mad or internally frustrated, just having lost any sense of caring about the outcome. Not about losing your love for someone but cutting the clock short on drama and interactions.

I am not trying to be mellow dramatic, I just realized this morning that my normal joval, roll with it personality has become tart, short and almost pissy with Mistress and Mighty Mo. This is not about marriage problems or mental deficencies on my part, I love my family with all my heart, its just the constant grinding of life at this particular moment in time that today has left me lacking as a husband and father. I know this happens from time to time with everyone else so lets just throw it out there.

Its been a long month now with all the illnesses and injuries going around the house and everything has fallen upon me to get things done. It has affected my training, it has affected my rest, it has affected my work and responsibilities around the house. I no longer listen about bumps, bruises or nicks. Coughing and whizzing leave me unfazed. Watching my family take turns on a nebulizer twice a day common place. I'm blocking things out.

Mistress understands this part of me. The part of me that has been thrown off routines that keep me cognitively sane. Not to elicite sympathy, just stating a fact of life here, but with my head injuries I lose my wallet and keys more than the usual guy unless I follow a routine on a daily basis. She knows this, she accepts this and she gives me great leeway right now out of concern to my well being. She knows this hasn't been easy for me either. Instead of ribbing me for not being able to find something I just put down, she coaxes me to remember where I have been around the house. She understands when I miss a turn on the freeway and it takes a bit longer to get somewhere.

All this can change with a few sane moments on my part so back to the question, how long does it normally take you to lose your empathy?

The Raid is Back

Alain Gaimard the co-creator of Raid Galouises, shamelessly ripped off and exploited quite well by Mark Burnett and his Eco-Challenge race, is coming back strong with a full season of X-Adventure races, one race held in western Idaho this year.

To qualify for the Raid World Cup a team must place well in three preceding X-Adventure Races which take place all over the world. All the races use the most extreme terrain in the world and combine outdoor sports from mountain biking to land navagation to glacier climbing, rappeling and kayaking.

Before triathlons, before my shoulder injury sidelined me from workouts, I was training for Adventure Racing. Ian Adamson is to this day my favorite all round athlete. I think that is why the Amazing Race is one of my favorite shows.

Once I get a breath from finishing a couple of Ironmans I will certainly be going back to this area of outdoor endurance racing. I have most all the gear already. Along with Adventure Racings, I would love to finish the Marathon des Sables, a 6 day/151 mile self supported footrace through the Sahara Desert, the Bataan Memorial Death March and an ultramarathon like the Chuckanut 50k or the Western States 100 miler. The ultimate after finishing an Ironman being Badwater 135 miler.

Life is full of fun.

Blue Seventy

Ironman wetsuits have changed their name to Blue Seventy to come in line with the new WTC mandate to call half ironmans, 70.3. I can really give a rip about the name change, I don't think its really necessary but hey I'm not a marketing guru.

In any regards, I was surfing Trisports.com and they now have the new suits for sale. Holy crap their flagship model, Helix, is expensive. 500 clams. I have an Ironman Stealth suit and only paid $329. I really think its the exact same suit. I can't tell if they are planning on selling off of two brands, Blue Seventy and Ironman until the Ironman stock is gone and then which over 100% to Blue Seventy or carry on with both labels.

My training partner, Hardcore, just picked up a new Pro-Motion wetsuit for only $239 and he liked it better than the older model Ironman that the airlines lost along with all his luggage last month. He says he feels more buoyant in it. I liked that it had some eye catching colors and the ankles have a three inch zipper to ease getting in and out.


A last shout out to my good tri buddy Nytro. I bet she didn't know that there is a triathlon website at the address, www.nytro.com? Hey you holding out on me and Iron(hubby)Benny?

Over Taper

Thank you all so much for your kind words to Mistress. She is feeling better with her sinus and ear infection. Nytro was phophetic in her comment stating she could diagnose any illness or ankle injury since Mistress got laid out by her 50 pound lab puppy on Friday who charged under her legs from behind and laid her out flat twisting her ankle badly.

This is the first real physical injury Mistress has ever sustained. Since we have been married for over ten years you would think that she would appreciate my dedication to physical harm and listen to my advice. No such thing. So she called the In-Laws and had them take her to the doctors who told her the same thing I did, sprained ankle, gave her the same advice I did without her rolling her eyes and gave her what I told her they would, a soft splint and 48 hours off her foot.

With all this injury now and illness earlier in the week, plus the two inches of rain yesterday, The Commodore has really not worked out much, if at all this last week, taking care of the family. I woke up this morning stiff, sore and with a headache. Not like after a hard training day but like my body upset that my training is so light.

Is it possible for a body to become so trained to exercise that the it can overtaper due to almost no precieved effort? Have any of you ever experienced that? Its later in the day now and I feel for the most part fine, but I can tell I need to put in some endurance training.

What say you?

Hell has frozen over. Snow in phoenix.

Trumped

The Training Contract this weekend with Mistress has been placed on hiatus, superceded by the official marriage contract. She is super sick and bit banged up physically so is moving slowly, coughing and really just not capable of taking care of herself and the Mighty Mo.

The whole sick and in health stuff is a bit more important than my 17 miles The Machine wants to put in tomorrow. I will get in some trainer time while the three of us watch Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire and do when he goes down for naps and such.

Really its a divine blessing that Mistress got sick this weekend since its a recovery weekend with little training and its supposed to rain finally. The wind has been blowing really hard and kicking up the dust. I pity the poor souls out on the IM course this weekend.

Leave a quick comment if you can wishing Mistress the best. She only reads the blog when I bring her to the monitor so if she see's some get well wishes it may boost her mood. Thanks if you do and have a good day.

IMAZ Run Update

The run course has been changed this year. The rumors abounded last weekend as I worked through my 13 miles of the marathon course. Last night was a volunteer-captian meeting and they made the announcement. The website no has the new route up.

IMHO I think its a good call. Logistically running on the canals at night is a nightmare unless there is artificial lighting every 50 yards. Running three loops keeps the course footprint tighter allowing for greater viewing and also better medical attention. (Safety, safety, safety).

I didn't mention this about the bike course but it is also different from last year. It has 18 less turns per loop than last year or 54 less times you have to slow down. Anyway the quote below is from an email, the link is too the course profile and a by turn breakdown after that.

They updated the run course for IMAZ , its now a 3 loop course without the canal in the picture but more hill action, GREAT! (Curry Rd and Lakeview Rd are nice inclines) they also have you getting within 100yds of the finish line twice before you finish, now that's just mean.

Here it is:

the profile and map: http://www.ironmanarizona.com/run.html

RUN COURSE
updated 03/09/2006

Exit North side of transition area
Turn Right (East) on Tempe Town Lake South Shore paved Bike path
Bear Right up to NorthWest corner of Rural Rd. & Rio Salado
Turn left and cross Scottsdale/Rural Rd bridge on the West side (in south bound slow lane)
Turn left through parking lot of Club Rio
Turn right on Tempe Town Lake North Shore paved Bike path
Turn Right at Marina Parking Lot toward 202 Underpass
Proceed under 202 on East Gilbert Drive
Bear left on sidewalk parallel to College Ave.
Turn Left at Curry Rd.
Turn Left at Lake View Rd.
Turn left into parking lot under 202 bridge.
Turn left on path at the end of the parking lot and follow East along Tempe Town Lake North Shore paved Bike path
Turn right on path at the west end of Marina parking lot.
Turn left and follow Tempe Town Lake North Shore paved Bike path back to Rural Rd. Bridge.
Turn left to sidewalk ramp to Rural Rd. bridge.
Turn right and cross Rural Rd. bridge.
Turn right on Tempe Town Lake South Shore paved Bike path to Dirt Path
Follow Tempe Town Lake South Shore dirt Bike path West under Mill Ave. Bridge past transition area
Follow path under rail road bridge and turn left to Rio Salado
Turn Right (West) on Rio Salado
Turn right on Priest Dr.
Turn right at end of Priest Dr. bridge on Tempe Town Lake North Shore paved Bike path
Turn left on Lake View Rd.
Turn right through parking lot under the 202 Hwy.
Turn right on to Mill Ave. Bridge.

To 2nd and 3rd laps turn right after you cross the bridge through Tempe Beach Park to Tempe Town Lake North Shore paved Bike path.

To finish, continue down Mill Ave. past loop turnaround to Rio Salado. Turn right on Rio Salado to finish line.

Internal dialogue-

This sucks I want to stop. I am not having fun today.

Its not about how well I do, its about why I do it.

Really? Why do I do it then?

Ahhhh. Ummmmm. I don't know why do I do this. Ah crap, its a simple answer dude... it doesn't matter with every step I get closer to being done today.

So I am just following some plan without a reason. Why not just stop now. I'm not trying to impress anyone. No one is out here. I've already proved I can run this far day after day after day. Stop.

No.

Stop.

Why?

Because I can't answer the question about why I do this. Its a simple question.

I'm too tired to answer it, I'll think about it on the way home.

No I won't. I'll turn on talk radio and zone out in traffic. Admit it, I don't know why...

I hate asking myself questions that are surprizingly easy and yet the answer is so hard to think about. I suck.

I don't suck. That's negative thinking. BAD SEED. BAD SEED.

Bad seed or not. I may have the mental toughness to get through this. I may have the physical ability to get through this. But why put myself through it?

Hey theres another runner, "Howdy."

"Hi, smells like it might finally rain. Hows your run?"

"Great thanks, I'm doing awesome."

Hey dumbass, you just answered your question. Now think about something else.

Digital Upgrade

I have a bunch of things I could post about today but I have really felt compelled to talk about Nepsa for the last couple of days.

I won an online contest sponsored by Nepsa last year and they created for me the awesome bloggerheadz you see above my blog and knocked off the .blogspot part of my web address by hosting my site. I really should have done both of those a long time ago, thats why I entered the contest.

I didn't honestly think CMS would become such a big part of my life. Nor did I ever consider that I would subscribe to about 80 rss feeds on bloglines. When I reached that sort of critical mass I knew I had to go to the next level. Maybe you don't personally feel that way about this online stuff but I guess I do. I didn't want it to become such an important part of my internal identity but it has.

I think that if anyone wants to distinguish their blog they need a kickass header. I tried to stumble through different online programs but really I could not create anything as sophisticated as what I got, in a fraction of the time. It just kills me to think of all my wasted training hours trying to butcher a subpar header and they got the current one up in a few hours.

On top of that the hosting gives a level of sophistication to your site by knocking out the blogspot domain name. Now I am not being snobbish, if you take my comments as such I do apologize, I am merely pointing out that if you use your blog as a connecting tool with professional organizations the .com ending has more cache. I started with blogspot because they were easy to set up and they are free. Nepsa lets you still use the blogpsot interface and you don't have to spend time redesigning your blog if your happy with what you've got. Of course if you do want to do some tiding up, well thats what their there for, so you don't have to spend frustrating hours working through html code.

When I started this crazy site I never thought I would use it as a medium to generate sponsorships or incentives. Now I find myself using CMS as a way to establish a level of credibility among people I am connecting with.

Maybe this is all in my head. Maybe I am thinking too much by half. Maybe I have 'drank the kool aid'. But I do know this. I got a kickass bloggerheadz and I got my domain, now, "All I need are some tasty waves, a cool buzz and I'm fine."

ETW: The day after

I feel pretty good. No training on Monday, a much deserved day of rest after a hard 48 hours. However, I like to keep myself busy so I scheduled the off day to coincide with meeting Ellie for the first time since she came to Arizona for the winter.

First off we met at a Starbucks. It wasn't hard to find her in the crowd since she glowed with energy and she had no coffee in her hands. I suppose the Senior Olympics Triathlon shirt didn't hurt either.

No No No I didn't take pictures. With all modesty I am a cross between Quasimodo and the Elephant Man. The best you get is my hardly shredded torn calf. Thanks for the ego boosting comment Shelley.

It is so amazing to met Ellie for the first time when knowing that in just a couple hundred days we will be floating the line at Ironman Florida together. Two more people on Team TriGeek Dreamers meeting up due to fate. We exchanged the funny nuances of our training and racing over the weekend, the sometimes strange direction were guided on with our walk with Christ. Movies, family...a very cool M-Dot tattoo that Ellie earned. Ladies I am thinking your going to go with her design when you see it. A bit too 'chick' for me but hey I wore pink tape on my calf over the weekend. No... too girlish for even my figure.

Give her some pressure maybe she will post a picture online.

Today is some light running, five miles tops I think. I have appointments to work around and this is supposedly a taper period. Someday I will do one correctly. I burned up a lot of fuel with Mistress due to long hours at work and lately long hours of training and need to make some appearances at home before she starts throwing my Training Contract in my face stating some clause about raising my son and being there for the family and all that stuff.

ETW Recap

Epic Training Weekend was a huge success. As a peak performance training block capping my No Limits Challenge I not only performed to my expectations but exceeded in some areas. We had new faces out there on the course thanks to the launching of our triathlon club website; one local, one from New Mexico, one from San Deigo and one from Glendale, which is technically the westside of Phoenix but might as well have a Palm Springs zip code.

Friday was John, his brother Dan from SD and The Good Doctor, who henceforth is known simply as The Machine. We met at Canyon Lake and swam along the beach for roughly 1.7 miles. For those of you who think that is too cold to swim, I confess with a 3mm cap it is quite comfortable after the initial shock. I set no speed record but completed the swim in 1:18, which when using Blog de Phil's excellent training calculators equals an IM swim finish just under an two hours.

Saturday was the true training peak. 0700 started with 8 intrepid souls swimming for distance. I swam 3,000 yards in 1:11. Didn't have to tack as much with a black line under me. Then we rode the IMAZ bike course for 3 loops. Due to a fun run taking over our normal staging area (IMAZ tranistion zone) we parked at a local park, which cut a couple miles off our course. I was still able to crank out 110 miles.

I had a great ride. I averaged 19.7 mph for the first 80 miles then hit some stiff wind which dropped me down to 17 mph for the last bit. In perspective when IronBenny and I rode the same course two weeks ago I was only averaging 18.3 mph for the first 80 miles.

I stopped and had my puke session right around mile 90. When I got off the bike for the run I was hurting. I was IMHO hydrated and sodiumed well, I think I really just had some GI issues, maybe the gatorade/carbpro mix I was living on.

The 4.5 run brick was a cruel joke on my system. I made it to 3 miles before another dry heave episode. Back at the truck, The Machine, already changed and waiting for me wanted to grab a burger but after watching me dry heave for another ten minutes he wisely decided to eat with his wife instead. I went home and boiled pasta in chicken broth and that was dinner. Well actually Mistress did the cooking, whole other story for you new folks reading this.

Felt much better Sunday. Two other guys I we rode with last summer came along for the ride. The wind was really blowing for the first 20 miles of the loop but the turnaround was strangely wind free so tore it up coming back. A quick transition into a 13.1 mile brick and I felt pretty good still. After all was said and done, after all the training in the previous 48 hours, I ran the half marathon in 2:25. I'll take that.

I think the best part of the whole weekend was the compliments I got from some of the other guys. Compliments on my riding improvement, compliments on my running and sticking through the puking to gut it out. I feel I crossed a critical line in IM training with this ETW.

I think I also made some improvements in my nutrition. Based on my ride with Benny and my ride Saturday I am removing Gatorade from my calorie bottles. Instead I am going to ride with just CarbPro/Water and a squirt of lemon juice in my bottles. I can get just as much bottle calories from the neutral CarbPro and can make up the electrolytes with nutritional supplements, I am already popping Succeed, adding a BCAA or other pill is no big deal.

Lessons learned from the edge of sanity.

Bike Sponsor

I am so excited to announce I now be riding a PHX Carbon TT/Triathlon bike from Valdora Cycles, a local bike company that has been designing and manufacturing bicycles, parts and accessories since 1996.

The PHX (pronounced: Phoenix) model, specs, is so new I am literally riding the first frame built off the boat. Valdora is known for its innovative and eye catching models like the AC-Tri and the BP2-Stealth. The PHX is their first all Carbon Fiber tri-specific model.


I feel that I have an inherent obligation now to ramp up my training even more in order to live up to this tremendous opportunity given to me. I do not want to fail Valdora in bringing people to their successful and beautiful brand. My mind is already full of powerful changes that I need to make to my 2006 training and racing season to show off this beauty.

I will be there from box to build to fitting and plan to put together a nice photo collection for you next week.

Thank you Valdora and thank you bloggers who motivate me to be a better triathlete. I don't want to let any of you down.

You have spoken...

In an effort to let you good people know just how much I care about you I am going to wear my racing stripe in pink this weekend.

For those that have forgotten or are new, the tape is for my torn calf muscle. I normally wear a nude or light blue, as seen in the photo. There is also a pink. In talkback many commenters suggested I should wear the pink.

You have spoken, I have listened.

Epic Training Weekend (ETW)

I didn't mention this but last weekend there was a speical Ironman training seminar going on in the Valley. While we did our long ride on the IMAZ course, we were catching glimpse of Paula Newby Fraizer and Paul Huddle as they corraled a bunch of young bucks and does through what looked like some good training. My training parter John actually rode a bit with Huddle when they got stuck at the turnaround. Very motivating. Had they not been so busy I would have tried to weasel in for a photo op.

In the spirit of kicking our collective asses into another level of training and as mental and physical preparation for the upcoming Ironman my training partners are doing here in the Valley Of The Sun, this is our ETW. Also its a great mini peak for the No Limits program I just completed.

Today come cold or frigid we are doing a long swim, at least 1.2 miles in Canyon Lake which if you remember was a mere 52 degrees just a couple weeks ago.

Saturday morning calls for swimming in the pool as far as you can for 90 minutes, then a full 112 mile ride of the Ironman course. My second century in three weekends.

Sunday is one 40 mile loop of the Ironman course and one loop of the marathon course (13.1 miles)

After that I firmally expect to puke my guts up and pass out.

Spring Fashion statements

In a further schism from my running background; from now on all running shorts will called 'diapers' on this blog. Tri shorts are so much more slimming.

It is a given that triathlon clothing is tight. From heretoforth it shall be called "Second Skin" on this blog.

Metrosexuals are not all triathletes though many triathletes are metrosexual. I think a man should only shave his his face, his back and his golf score on a regular basis. No man should ever shave his legs bare unless he lost a bet or Ironman is week away.

Thank God that the fashion houses have brought back thick, funky belts for spring. I no longer have to see size 12 girls wearing size 8 low rider jeans, so that their fat guts hang over their jeans and look like the tops of muffins which gave way to me labeling them "Muffin Guts' and being forever banned from the Express store near my house.

I want to end this post with a great link to a video from Pink. Its about 3 minutes long. Its a great message about female role models in society. I wish more people would preach this kind of upbringing for young women instead of trying to tell us things like Demi Moore looking fabulous for her age and not mentioning she had $325,000 of plastic surgery for Charlies Angels 2.