Friday, January 4, 2008

Open Letter

An honest letter to many friends. Maybe you need this letter too. Maybe you need to give a modified version to someone close to you.

From the top of my pedal stroke I really want you to show up on Saturday for the ride. I am going to go 70 miles or 3 loops on the course. Any distance you are able to manage into your day is important and necessary. Just because you don't have the ability to go all that way tomorrow should not dissuade you from putting in some effort with the team for any distance.

We have some big goals set for ourselves this year and I ride, run and swim in dread and respect of my goals this very day. I too have failed to live up to my personal expectations. There are days I have let myself down when it comes to nutrition. There are workouts where I have stopped my watch many miles short of my planned distance. Knowing I am capable of these failures, sometimes all of them in one day, still does not give me fear that I will not be victorious this year.

I know that I have been lonely doing much of my training on my own. Sitting on the trainer late at night sucks. I don't want to get out of bed early to run. There's never enough time to get in a whole swim. Then when I am with the team on the weekends, all my perceived failures are magnified by people with fresher legs, higher cadence, faster splits.

And yet... and yet I continue to lift myself up and continue to move forward. Ever forward. Charlie Mike-Continue the Mission. Each practice and each day a continual movement toward a destiny I myself determined with the click of a button submitting my application. I have many days with destiny this year. And so do you. Today be the person you see in your mind when you hit the Submit button for each race you enter. That infinitesimally small pause between crazy and committed, when you envision yourself at the waters edge calm, fully prepared and ready to attack. The fact is that all of us go into races over-trained or under-trained and convinced its the best place to be for that day. We forget our nutrition and lose our race belts. All things that spiraled out of control in our mad dash to prepare for race morning.

Training and preparing for races is not supposed to be a mad dash. Its supposed to be a lifestyle. Maybe you have a lifestyle I don't know about. Maybe you're training your ass off and not telling me. That can be a good strategy. Most likely your letting yourself down and not telling anyone about it. Your training but not with accountability. Your putting in miles but its not motivating. Your enjoying the luxury of training whenever you want, but you find your filling that time with whatever you want instead of training. It's always a came of catch up.

No one knows better than I in the last year what it's like to be a part of this amazing group of people and yet still feel left out. You were in the midst of your season last summer and I took a 2 month rest period, still showing up but going through the motions. When I came back from my off-season, you were peaking for Soma and I was going through base training, in Zone 2 of all places, while the rest of you beat each other into glycogen failure in practice. Now you've had your off-season. Time to reconnect with your family, have some guilt free eating and rest your body and mind. Enjoy yourself for all the hard work you put in last year and it was hard work. You did good. Today, I don't care how much the shirt shrank. I don't care what your pace is. I care about you hitting your goals and meeting expectations that don't make you vomit when your done. Being part of the team instead of saying it.

I don't care if you think I am an asshole for saying this. And this isn't about me being better than you. Its about me being concerned for your goals. To let you know that when you joined this team, you became a part of something more than yourself. Others are invested in your success.

I really hope to see you Saturday. On Sunday afternoon I am swimming for 30 minutes at El Dorado then going on a 30 mile ride up the IMAZ course. Just to give you options.

Comm

9 comments:

LBTEPA said...

GREAT POST COMMS!
Thanks

Nytro said...

great post, comm. needed to hear it.

nytro

Dr. Iron TriFeist :) said...

I'm in for at least 2 hours of the ride. See you tomorrow, in spirit.

Run, Bike, Knit said...

Thanks for the great post!

SingletrackJenny (formerly known as IronJenny) said...

I'll be snow-shoeing, but I'll be thinking of you!
great post.
Jenny

Bigun said...

you know, comm...every "group"...every organization, formal or informal cries out for leadership. Even the pocket of 5 or 10 folks that sometimes train togeather. Way to step up.

Kewl Nitrox said...

Thanks Comm, I needed that.

Fe-lady said...

I was there...by myself too..or with hubby...but I was there! It's OK to train alone...don't depend on others for your workouts...do them anyway. Do them for you!

Bill said...

It was a race weekend here, so Sunday was a ever-stiffening 7 hour drive home.

Keep pushing, Comms.